Interview
Highlights
On his current
writing
"I feel like I'm working for myself at this
point. If it's publishable, fine. If not, it makes not too much difference.
Because I claim that this time is for me and me alone. I'm 83 years old."
"I'm writing a poem right now about a nose. I've
always wanted to write a poem about a nose. But it's a ludicrous subject.
That's why, when I was younger, I was afraid of [writing] something that didn't
make a lot of sense. But now I'm not. I have nothing to worry about. It doesn't
matter."
On wishing he had children, sort of
"I would infinitely prefer a daughter. If I had a
son, I would leave him at the A&P or some other big advertising place where
somebody who needs a kid would find him and he would be all right. ... A
daughter would be drawn to me. A daughter would want to help me. Girls are
infinitely more complicated than boys and women more than men. And there's no
doubt about that. We just don't like to think about it. Certainly the men don't
like to think about it. I have lived my whole life with a dream daughter."
On not
discussing therapy sessions with his late partner, a psychoanalyst
"It just
seemed like, why? It just seemed inauthentic and incorrect to
burden him with that. My therapy went on forever. My being gay was something of
not great interest to me. The person I lived with — we lived together for all
of those years so we make trips to our favorite places in Europe, so that we
could read our favorite books, so that we could listen to music.
"I couldn't deal with 9/11 the other day. I
couldn't bear it. ... That evening of 9/11, they conducted Mahler's 2nd
Symphony. ... And I sat there and cried like a baby listening to the
music."
On being gay
"Finding out that I was gay when I was older was
a shock and a disappointment. ... I did not want to be gay. It meant a whole
different thing to me — which is really hard to recover now because that's many
years ago. I always objected to it because there is a part of me that is solid
Brooklyn and solid conventional and I know that. I can't escape that. It's my
genetic makeup. It's who I am."
On his life
"I have nothing now but praise for my life. I'm
not unhappy. I cry a lot because I miss people. They die and I can't stop them.
They leave me and I love them more. ... What I dread is the isolation. ...
There are so many beautiful things in the world which I will have to leave when
I die, but I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready."
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